New Poetry Book

This is a collection of poems, thoughts, short stories, and art. I hope you enjoy them. Many of my poems might be dark and depressing, but writing is how I cope with things life throws at us. When I’m frustrated, hurt, and sad, I write. It helps me cope with my feelings though not every poem will fit this description most of them will. I write on a slew of subjects; motherhood, family, miscarriage, children, raising children and many more. Sometimes moms get into a competition of who’s the better mother or who has the best kids, whose job is hard, and that mindset helps no one. So, I promise to be as real as I can, hoping the things that have challenged me can help someone else.

It Hurts Like Hell

woman looking at sea while sitting on beach
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
 Itโ€™s imperative to know how important you are.
Many people think they are important, they put themselves on pedestals.

You think you can count on certain people, but in the end, you canโ€™t.
Sometimes the harsh reality hits you, and you realize how insignificant you are.

Or that you donโ€™t matter to the people who matter to you.
The people you thought you can count on, the people that can count on you.

That foundation you built, comes falling down.
Itโ€™s important to know where you stand, butโ€ฆ.

It hurts like hellโ€ฆ It hurts like hell.
 

Role Play

I love role playing. It lets me write and be creative while working out ideas for stories. Sometimes when I have writers block on a book, I can go to one of my RP groups and write something completely different.

One part to new members!
Freedom means you are free to create your own plots & ideas. Admins will not create plots for you. You are free to be creative. Our story is ongoing, so as long as it fits in the story, you can go for it. Come Roleplay Marvel/DC/Fantasy Characters and more. We are not a once upon a time group.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/FreedomRoleplay

Happy Easter

High Functioning Anxiety

This is me. Someone I know posted this on their Facebook and I felt called out. I commented, “This is so me!”

Each Morning

Photo by Rachel Cook on Unsplash
Each morning the sun comes up.
A new blessing to the world.
Each day, a new beginning.
A joyous day to start a new
New promises, a chance to change.
Be a better person.
Make a difference in your life.
Make a difference in someone elseโ€™s life. 
Each morning the sun comes up.
A new blessing to the world.
You are the star shining bright.
Bring this light into the world.

One Night

Photo by Aliyah Jamous on Unsplash
One night, two people.
Calling me names, blasting me to others.

Some say it doesnโ€™t matter.
I should forget it and move on.
Itโ€™s their loss and blah blah blah...

Bullshit!

Why does it hurt so badly if all these other people say it shouldnโ€™t.
Why am I the target? Am I weak?
Why is it so hard to walk away? Why do I want to keep talking?

And why do I get so angry? Why am I so hurt?

You’re in My Seat


church

Photo byย Karl Fredricksonย onย Unsplash

I had an interesting experience at church last week and it reminded me of these two stories I have heard pastors use for their sermons.

In the first story, a man is visiting a church. This man sat in a pew and a lady came up to him and said, โ€œIโ€™m sorry, but you are sitting in my pew.โ€ This man got up and moved to another pew. Again, a man came up to him and said, โ€œYouโ€™re sitting in my pew.โ€ This happened several times before the man left the church. I have heard this story told by pastors with the message of welcoming new members.

There is another version of this story where the man sitting in everyoneโ€™s pew was a homeless man who smelled and wore torn clothes. At the end of this story, he came to the front of the church and said, โ€œYou asked me to move because I was sitting in your pew. I have sat in your pew and have died for your sins.โ€ The man was Jesus. The Bible says giving to those in need is giving to Jesus. We should embrace people in need and welcome them.

When I went to church last weekend with my children, I had a similar experience. I drove into the parking lot and saw an open parking space. I drove in and parked, while a car came up next to mine and rolled down the window. A middle-aged woman was in the driverโ€™s seat, so I assumed she needed directions or something.

So I asked, โ€œCan I help you with anything?โ€ What came next surprised both me and my children. She said, โ€œItโ€™s my parking spot. We only have six spots, so you need to move.โ€

I looked at her, confused for a moment, then I realized she was attending the church next to mine. So I replied, โ€œWell, itโ€™s a good thing I am not coming here to visit your church because I will never come back.โ€ I then drove off and parked my car elsewhere.

The woman pulled out of the spot she was in and moved her car closer to her church. My kids caught this and said, โ€œSo she just pulled in next to you to tell you to move your car. Jesus will not like that.โ€ And my kids are correct. What if someone was planning on visiting this church or someone thinking about becoming a Christian? That person may never want to visit another church or become a Christian if Christians treat others this way. My daughter said, โ€œI guess thatโ€™s why they only have 6 parking spots; no one wants to go to their church. I love our church. Everyone is nice and friendly.โ€

People expect Christians to be perfect, but we are far from perfect. Sometimes it takes compassion and common sense. This woman didnโ€™t have either. She taught my children a lesson. She taught them to always welcome others because they know what it feels to not be welcome. It might be a small thing, but for someone searching for a church or someone searching for God, itโ€™s a big thing.

I Was Wrong

Photo by Keenan Constance on Unsplash

I Was Wrong

 I thought they were my friends.
I thought I was important.
I thought they would support me, 
But alas, I was wrong.
I cherished the memories,
I cherished our talks,
I cherished our friendship,
But alas, I was wrong to cherish these things.
In the end, it never mattered.
In the end, it is all gone.
In the end, I am alone.

To Keep a Promise


To Keep a Promise

 A promise is something sweet,
A caring gesture of friendship and love.
 
Sincere thoughts and a heartfelt vow,
A pledge of honor and faith.

When promises brake and friendships shattered,
You blackened your heart with lies.
 
How far do you go to recapture that trust?
What will you do to regain that love?
The vow and the faith you once had,
Why do you keep your promise when others do not?


Should you mend something thatโ€™s broken?
How do you fix the friendship all in ruins?
A trust that is a dilapidated mess?
How far will you go to keep a promise of a friendship long gone?